My friend, Rebecca, had an interesting post about not feeling like she wanted to share things. I have been struggling in same way. I have been wrestling with trying to understand where the issue is in that for me. I came across an article that I think had some answers in it for me: where I'm seeing pitfalls in these types of conversations and what the core of the thing really needs to be:
We should begin with a distinction between principles
and applications. Whenever we have confusion regarding a principle and its
application, we're bound to have disagreement on standards and lifestyle
issues. Principles are timeless and cross-cultural. What is true for one
generation or group of people is just as true for another.
But principles are theoretical concepts. They need to be
lived, to be applied in real life. Such applications require interpretation of
the principle, and interpretations may change from one generation to another,
and from one culture to another.
Because times change, the applications of one generation can
be expected to be inadequate for the succeeding generation. However, the
biblical principle should remain stable. Many Christians simply want shortcut
answers. They cry for a quick fix of ready-made applications. For example, they
want to know if a certain music group, or even a specific song by the group, is
acceptable for Christians. A simple "Yes" or "No" response
might be quick, but it hardly leads to a careful decision based upon principle.
Rather, those who raised the question are likely to compare their personal
opinion with your verbalized application. As a result, one can easily get
caught arguing about applications rather than getting to the root
of the issue, which is the principle.
To allow flexibility in applications requires a tolerance
that few of us are willing to permit. The reason is twofold. First, freedom of
personal application is a threat to the image of unity that we like to preserve
as a worldwide religious movement. Second, such freedom shifts the focus of
behavior from externals to inner motives. To allow freedom and flexibility in
lifestyle may be dangerous--but not to do so would be even more dangerous.
In any discussion of standards, we need to be aware of some
dangers. First, the tendency to compare one's self with others. The Bible
speaks of such comparisons as foolish (see 2 Corinthians 10:12). Comparison
encourages us to think we are acceptable to God because we are more strict than
others in certain areas of behavior. Conversely, we can come to believe that we
are not acceptable to God because everyone else seems to be better. Some might
even discard a body of believers because behavior has been elevated to the
status of principle. In any case, it's unwise to use lifestyle issues as a
measure of one's spirituality. Although actions are observable, the underlying
motives, critical for proper understanding, frequently are misunderstood.
A second danger is the frustration of inconsistency. It's so
easy to change with the situation that we lose sight of the principles and
values that should guide decision-making. Going with the flow requires little
thought or self-discipline. It is possible to focus on one area of action and
neglect other areas. We can tithe mint, dill, and cumin, but neglect justice,
mercy, and faithfulness, as Jesus poignantly observed (see Matthew 23:23, 24).
It is easy to have blind spots. Since we tend to attract friends who agree with
us, group-think tends to make us unaware of our own bias as long as we remain
with the same group.
Third, the danger of overconfidence. When people are
convinced that they have "the Truth," certainty rules the day.
Defensiveness takes priority over tolerance. Questions must fit into
prescribed answers. Unless our understanding of God's truth continues to
develop, either our answers or we begin to lack relevance. That means that all
of us need to be re-treaded periodically, so to speak.
The entire life span can be viewed as a series of stages in
which perspectives change and a person needs to readjust his or her thinking as
a result of new perceptions of God and life. Some think that once a person has
made an assent to "the Truth," he or she is sealed for life. For a
child baptized by the age of 12, there may need to be several shifts in
understanding of principles and their application on the way to adulthood.
Unless this deepening and stretching in understanding takes place, those who
were baptized at 12 may abandon their Christian commitment before reaching
their young adult stage in life. This dialogue and interaction with respected
adults and committed peers is a vital ingredient in the maturing process.
A fourth danger is the fear that without specific rules or
restraints people will go out of control. Parents and others responsible for
young people take great pains to identify the areas in which freedom should be
curbed. Adults who seek to protect young people are prone to make choices for them.
Such action, even when motivated by love, prevents young people from maturing,
and may even lead them to believe that they live in "slavery". Adults
need special wisdom to steadily remove imposed restraints as adolescents move
into young adulthood, making their own choices. The best protection adults can
give young people is to provide them with Bible-based decision-making skills in
an atmosphere of love and respect. Freedom must be accompanied by
responsibilities. Thus they will be prepared for adulthood, when they will make
decisions totally on their own, regardless of what parents or other authority
figures demand.
A fifth danger in dealing with lifestyle issues is that the discussion itself becomes central, edging out Jesus. It's somewhat like the Jewish experience of surround the law with countless inconsequential rules. People living in Palistine in Jesus' time became so conscious of the rules that they never understood the core of any God's law. Is it possible that we have surround Jesus with so many rules that in any discussion of lifestyle people see only the peripheral standards but not Jesus? Any dialogue on lifestyle should lead to the core of the matter - Jesus.
~Di
). It's of Gracie and me in my parents backyard relaxing!
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